But, right now... it is all about baby!!!
Sunday and Monday I had a horrible melt down. Seriously I couldn't stop crying. I cried during church. I cried at the Cowboys cookout. I cried when we got home. I cried at work. I cried in the car. I just couldn't stop crying. Most of my cries went something like this... I want a baby, why cant we have a baby, why did we have to have a miscarriage, why did I gain my weight back, why wont it just fall off, I WANT A BABY!!!
Looking back, it was kind of funny. Poor Casey, everything was his fault and he couldn't do anything right. Man I love my husband!
Tuesday I took a pregnancy test and I swore I could see a line starting to appear. I sent it out to my line judges, aka some of my girlfriends, to tell me if I am crazy or not. They said they saw it too! I woke Casey up by jumping on the bed with excitement. He couldn't see it, but he played along anyways. Like I said, I love my husband!!!
I decided that over lunch (when Casey was with me) to take another test. The line was darker this time!! It was finally* happening again. I was so excited. I started crying again and Casey had a look on his face like "oh gosh, here we go again." But it was happy tears this time!!! (I say finally because to me, it felt like a million years since I had my miscarriage and I just wanted to be pregnant again)
We both decided that we were going to share the GREAT news with friends and family now instead of waiting for 12 weeks. I understand why people wait, I do... but I am not one of those people. I live my life as an open book and I love to be surrounded by people who love us and will pray for us. With this being a pregnancy after a miscarriage, I felt the need to share it early so that people could send us love, well wishes and tons of prayers. I think we might need them just to conquer the fear (which I will talk about another day).
Yesterday I went to the doctor and she confirmed everything for me! We are in fact 4 weeks pregnant and due June 26th. She is going to watch my HCG levels the next couple weeks and make sure they are going up like they are supposed to be. I will have my 1st set of numbers back today and then will go in on Monday to have my blood drawn again. The line on the pregnancy test gets darker each time I take a new one, so it is looking good on my end (yes, I am a pee stick addict).
To do:
Workout - cardio only
Get back on track with eating clean
Stop Thrive (will talk about another day)
Start yoga at least once a week
Focus only on the good and not on the what ifs
Y'all, I am SO excited!!!! I promise I wont be too annoying throughout this journey but if you do find me annoying, I am sorry I am just so thrilled to be having a baby with my husband and giving my son a sibling!!! This is an EXCITING time!!!! Eek!!!
I wish you and your growing family blessings... I can relate to your story although I didn't share my story with anyone other than close friends & family. I appreciate that you did share your story and I send prayers your way. xoxoxo
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